The Most Bizarre Encounter I’ve Ever Had with a Jehovah’s Witness

I still have no explanation for this one.

Lisa Marie

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Photo by Jonathan Wells on Unsplash

I want to start by making one thing clear: I am not using this article as an excuse to bash Jehovah’s Witnesses (“JWs”). I have never been one myself, and to be completely honest, I feel like I’d get tossed out of a Kingdom Hall in five minutes flat. The fact that I flat-out refuse to wear dresses or skirts probably doesn’t help.

That said, I’m not going to be rude. That’s not my style. I just want to talk.

You don’t have to be a JW to know that the group takes evangelism very seriously. Heck, I remember an old joke book my parents used to keep in their bathroom containing the following one-liner: “What do you get when you cross a punk with a Jehovah’s Witness? Someone who knocks on your door at 8 am to tell you to f*ck off.

However, that’s just a Baby Boomer joke. In real-time, I’ve never had a JW knock on my door. Instead, my interactions with JWs have always been random face-to-face interactions or via mailers, including a local lady who was very insistent on sending me some paper prayer rug. (I’m not kidding — we quite literally mailed that thing back and forth for 2 months. I’m sure the post office was thrilled when we finally stopped!)

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Lisa Marie

College instructor who writes about life, pop culture, and social issues from the perspective of a left-leaning elder millennial.